Friday 3 November 2017

2017 in retrospect, the rough before the smooth.

Apologies for my absence again. I took a few months off from dating as it started to hit my confidence levels quite hard. Off the back of a toxic relationship and some health issues, dating was one drama I could do without. Looking back on my last blog in February I cant believe that was only this Year. I'd completely forgotten about a couple of those !

Since then what has happened- probably too many non progressing dates to be honest. I had a previous gentleman get back in touch, apologise for his disappearance overnight - we had met a couple of times and got on well, for him to then vanish. I told him I understood life gets in the way. I don't hold grudges. So we chatted again, and he vanished again ! Never mind. These things happen.
I also attempted a long distance relationship- the work of the armed forces kept him out the country literally a week after we met, then family holiday commitments both sides interfered with meeting up. We did get to go away for a weekend trip to a wedding, but once again the friendship zone hit, and we parted ways. Again I don't hold grudges. I want someone to be totally into me, to have the time in their life for me, to message me even just to say hi, and to include me in future events they have planned. And if its not right on one side then there is no point in holding on and wasting someones time. Both these guys I wish all the best in their lives, and I know they do with me too.

So I found myself on line again. And instantly regretted it. I caught the attention of a man who decided to try a different tact when chatting to me.
So this was how it started -


Turns out I had innocently forgotten to change my body shape on my profile. Now the options available are limited- literally -6 options-  rather not say, thin, athletic, average,few extra pounds , big & tall/BBW.  So I must have selected athletic when I'd originally set my profile up. Okay since then I may have added a few pounds , but I don't think its a massive misdemeanor as I'm still active .

But this guy took offence. He continued 


Seriously where does this guy get off ? ! I know I shouldn't have done but I bit, and I had to reply....




Ok , so I may have lied in that one - should read a curvy uk size 12. But on what planet does anyone have the right to insult someone like that? I took it to heart, and I admit I cried. After Years of dating and meeting people I have never felt so low as I did at that point. I like my curves- ok I have a few I would rather I didn't have- but don't we all! As we get older its not so easy to stay skinny as you did in your 20s.  . This photo is me just a few months ago.  A photographer friend of mine has even used my curves for an exhibition hes doing. I wish I could share the photos but they are under wraps for now. But I'm really pleased with his photos and that helped build my confidence back up. 
This man obviously has had some bad experiences and decided he would just verbally attack someone.  Thing is he was no oil painting himself. He looked like he had an obsession with sun beds, or an unhealthy addiction to laying in the sun. But his attitude was shocking. Its worrying to think he may be a father, and thinks its acceptable to show his son how to degrade women. 

But I put the upsetting incident behind me & didn't let it put me off. Guess what..........

I've finally found a good man !!!

I might even share our story some time with you !